I have to confess something.
I haven't been doing any of my homework in a while. Like longer than a month. This is not me being hard on myself. It's the solid cold truth. And I'm feeling slightly ashamed and disappointed in myself.
There's a saying I remember similar to "Don't be mad at yourself for what you did not do". But at the same time, procrastinating and avoiding work is something that I did do. Therefore, I do have a reason to get angry at myself. But, my dear swimming teacher told me a quote that makes me feel better about myself "If you do something wrong, don't be sorry. Be Better." And that's what I need to do. Be better.
Instead of taking school and homework day by day, hour by hour, just wishing time would pass a little faster or if I had more hours in the day, I need to say, "I want to be better with my study habits." I'm killing myself inside and it's showing in the external world - in my marks and in the way that I isolate myself around my peers and family.
My only question now, that I need to answer is ... am I willing to start being better? Or will I roll in the dirt of my mistakes, constantly apologizing to myself?
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